Hi everyone.

How cold its been. i am a mother of three boys ages 20,17,12. We are moving in August to live in spain My only concern is that my two older boys are unsure about coming with us. if they do not want come they will have to find a flat in the area we live in, people keep telling me i am selfish for leaving them, but i dont feel like that. Am i wrong to leave them, they know they can come. Is it hard for two lads out their, they know a few local guys.

Is there anyone out their that has took boys or girls of that age out to live. If so can you give some advice.

#thanks

When we moved over my son was 17,at first it was hard for him ,but he made friends easily and settled into life within a month.We moved to an expat community on the Costa Del Sol so he could meet people & years later he is very happy own company and flat.
Do your boys want tio come with you? Does the older one work in the UK ? You are not selfish so dont listen to anyone.

Thank you for replying to my message,it has help a lot. My eldest son works at the Halifax Bank and likes his job. I am very close to him and my seventeen year old and what them to come. I really want a new life out their and i think it will be bett er for them.
If they stay i will come over every few months to see them, i have put money aside for this.
But i told them they can come when ever they like. So i think i have given them a choice. Are they to young to be left. When i leave they will be nearly 21 and 18. They both work.
I feel for the youngest one.
Thank you for reading

will tell you 21 old son to stay working for the bank , good money in uk

18 year old can do what he was as he young and free

I agree with jurdyr,your eldest should stay as he has a good job and they are not easy to come by.What does your other son do?
Do you have friends and family near were your sons live? We had to return to the UK after living here for 2 years due to my father in law being very ill,stayed there for 2 years and my son ,by now was 19/20 he stayed in Spain and had the back up of my Parents,thats why i asked.
Where abouts in Spain are you looking to move to? It is only a short flight away so any probs and they can just pack a bag and come over.

As already mentioned by some one else, if I was your oldest son, I would stay in UK for my job.  As finding work isn’t very easy for the moment, I think it’s better to keep the job ans see within a few years what the economy does and he can always move in a later stadium.
The same for you 17 year old son, unless he isn’t working.
Your yougest will adept very fast I think and that wan’t be a problem.
I wish you all the best.

Thanks everyone !!!  I think they should stay in england. I will help them sort a flat . My parents live local and they have loads of aunties and uncles and cousions. I do not want to live them, i want them to come, but aleast they have a choice. I will see them every two months and they will come out. My only wish is that they would let me know for sure. Aleast that way i can perpare.
The replies has help a great deal.
thank you everyone. If at a later date they want to come they can.

Just a quick thought re your eldest, if his main tie to the UK is work, it could be worth his investigating a possible transfer to the Halifax-Hispania bank in Spain if a vacancy exists?  But I agree with previous posters, it would be a very bad time to leave a relatively secure position.  And you are giving them new options for the future, by creating a new life and home in Spain.  Very best of luck!

Maya

I know it must be hard for u making this move without your sons.But putting that aside have you made a decision on :
were to live
buy or rent
need to work or not
schooling for your youngest
There are many other thing you need to check out before you make that final move.
All your questions can be answered on this forum there are a lot of experts on this matter who are all om this forum and willing to help.
wishing you good luck